Here is a hot topic that Mo and I have been discussing for a few weeks now and thought to get some other perspectives, so please comment if you have a view. I am kinda sticking my neck out here because it is a sensitive topic for some folks, but heck, isn't that what bloggin' is for.
Trans-racial adoption. Good or Bad? Here are some thoughts from us and what literature says. Research and "the experts" say that unless the parents live in a multiracial community then trans-racial adoption should not occur. It is harmful to the child as they age and search for an identity and struggle with not looking similar to their adoptive parents.
Sanger is not a multicultural mecca. It doesn't matter to us, but it is not about us. It is about the child. Is love enough? Mo brought up a valid point. "The adoption should be the child's story to tell, not his skin's. No one should be able to look at our family and say he is not ours. " Makes sense. But we can't get away from the feeling like we are ordering a pair of shoes. "Yes, we would like to order a child to adopt. Make it a male, 0-2 years old, Caucasian and limited handicaps. Drug addition is OK." It just doesn't sit well with my heart.
And in case you haven't noticed, soon everyone will be multiracial and being a "pure blood" will be the minority. And although it doesn't matter to our family, we have never been the minority and so we don't have that perspective. Can a white man teach an African American boy how to be an African American man? Can a white man teach a Latino boy how to be a Latino man? Research says no. Cultural views from other ethnic groups say no. And we don't know any adults who have been trans-racially adopted to get their point of view. The sad fact is that most couples who are wanting to adopt and do foster care are Anglo. Where are children who are of another ethnicity to go? I mean, there are such strong view points that there are even adoption agencies that specialize in placing children who are other ethnicities with only those ethnicities to which they belong. This is huge.
So, what are your thoughts?
2 comments:
I have thoughts but that is all they are. I have never adopted children (much less children of a different race). But my friends have and you should read their thoughts here.
Personally I think it's a beautiful and magnificent thing and I applaud you guys!
We have several friends that have fostered and adopted several children from different ethinc backgrounds. Have a mulit-racial family is different and fun. My chidren have a greater understanding of life from it. Granted Jorge is here, butI think that if your heart is willing to accept that child you should. All other things will fall into place.
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